Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Clyde Watson

All throughout my pregnancy I KNEW our little boy was going to be early. My motherly intuition told me so, and motherly intuition doesn’t lie! I informed my mom that I thought she should come as early as she could- I had some projects for her to help me with before the baby came. She flew to Boise on September 30 and we (as in she… I just sat and watched…) got busy in those first few days painting, sewing, and hanging pictures. It was so nice to have someone help me with those last few things I wanted to get done, because I just didn’t have the energy or motivation to do it myself.
So, I KNEW my baby was coming early. I decided to take castor oil on Friday, October 3. I mixed up my orange juice and oil, Instagrammed it, drank it down at about 10 pm, had a shower and went to bed.
Sleeping was horrible the last couple weeks of pregnancy. When I would lie down, Clyde would settle in nicely on what felt like my lungs and make it real hard to breathe. I would lie there counting to ten and trying to slow my breathing. Needless to say, I did not get much sleep that night. Since my “instincts” were telling me he was going to be early, and since castor oil worked with Ruby, I figured I was having a baby the next day! It took for-ev-er to fall asleep, and once I did I was wakened by the need to do what castor oil makes you have to do. (I’ll leave that to the imagination.)
Saturday morning I woke up and was having mild contractions. (YAY!) I did the usual and went about my day. A friend mentioned on Instagram that castor oil gave her contractions, but only because she was dehydrated.  I took note and decided it was better to not go to the hospital than to go and be sent home, so I made sure to drink a lot of water.
My contractions were coming every 2-3 minutes, so I finished packing the hospital bag and we decided that we’d head to the hospital. We were just informing everyone of our plans when the contractions just stopped. THEY JUST STOPPED! I couldn’t believe it. We waited and waited for them to come back but it just wasn’t happening. Today was not the day. (And drinking that castor oil and staying up all night was such a WASTE!)

The next several days were terrible. I was a grouchy, hormonal mess. All I wanted to do was go into labor, and every day that I was still pregnant was another day that I was a miserable cow. My due date came and went. Blake’s birthday came and went. I was STRESSED to the point of tears about having the baby on his birthday. He made it clear that that would be the best gift ever, and how badly he wanted to share a birthday with his son. Everyone and their dog said how cool it would be for them to share a birthday, and several people said “He’s coming today I just know it!” Every time someone said anything about having a baby that day I wanted to tell them to mind their own %($%*^@ business and leave me the %*$%^ alone! It was definitely my darkest hour and I’m sure my melt down on the way to dinner and how completely self-absorbed I was throughout the day made for not the best birthday for Blake. Ya… I’m a good wife? Hopefully the dirt and worms cake made up for it.
I stayed dilated at 3.5cm for 3 weeks despite my efforts. Walks, essential oils, ankle massage, and yes, even sex had no effect on my stubborn cervix. On Tuesday October 14 I went to the midwife and was STILL 3.5. At this point, my mom had been here for two weeks and had to leave on Saturday. I wasn’t going to let her leave without even meeting the baby! Oh and I thought I would have had my baby forever ago soooooo we scheduled an induction for the next morning at 7:00 am!
That night, I slept HORRIBLY. I knew I had to be up early so I got in bed at 9:30. Naturally, Clyde settled in comfortably on my lungs and I hyperventilated until about 1am when I finally fell asleep. Of course, the nerves didn’t help- I was SO excited that I would finally be freed from the prison that is pregnancy! (That sounds terrible but don’t judge until YOU are overdue and miserable.)

October 15, 2014! We got settled into our hospital room and they gave me Cytotec at about 8:30. I had to stay in bed until 10:30 so they could monitor me and make sure I was all good, but after that, I began to WALK WALK WALK! I was ready! Let’s have a baby! Little did I know that being induced didn’t mean you would just suddenly start having intense contractions... what the heck? Things were picking up- as in I was having contractions- but I wanted harder, more frequent contractions! I wanted this baby OUT! Bring on the pain! I walked and walked, bounced on the exercise ball, walked, ate lunch, walked while holding the iPad and watching Nashville… I was doing a LOT of walking, it was kind of tiring me out.

The nurse came in and checked me around 1 and I was a 5. I walked, squatted, lunged some more. My midwife came in at 3 and checked me, and I had made it to a 6. HOLY SLOW PROGRESS. At the rate I was going it would be hours before this baby was born, so we decided to go ahead with breaking my water. After she did that I got out of bed and could instantly feel the baby’s head pressing on my cervix, and the contractions instantly sped up and got more intense. SWEET, I thought to myself, it’s go time! With each contraction I had to concentrate more and more and really focus to get through the pain.

With Ruby, I was dead set on not getting an epidural. I had done a lot of reading and preparing and knew that I was going to have her naturally. This time around, my thought process was all about “we’ll figure that out when we get there.” Knowing how painful (yet awesome) delivering Ruby naturally was, I didn’t want to make any final decisions because each birth can be so different! Maybe this time the pain would be too much and I WOULD want an epidural? I was very open this time to whatever my needs would be.

With each contraction, I focused on counting, breathing, and visualizing. I used some methods found in the Hypnobirthing technique- my favorite was closing my eyes and picturing the alphabet floating by, and reciting each letter 3 times in my head: A, a, a, b, b, b, c, c, c….” It was seriously AMAZING how much this helped! I found that leaning on Blake with my arms around his neck was the most comfortable position, and when I wasn’t in this position it was TERRIBLE. I tried sitting and leaning on the ball once… it was not good. As the contractions got more intense I had Blake squeeze my hips together as hard as he could. I really tried to visualize my cervix opening and the baby’s head moving further down with each contraction, and maybe this is weird but I really felt like I could feel it opening, like a distinct OPENING feeling. (Is that a normal thing? I don’t know.) Between contractions I tried to rest and sit on the bed because all that walking had really worn me out! My legs felt like Jello and I was exhausted.

The nurses told me to let them know when I felt “that pushing feeling” so I tried to power through each contraction until it came. I talked with my mom about MAYBE I needed some drugs- what do narcotics do? Should I get some? Of course I am terrible at making decisions so I just let it be… If someone wasn’t going to force me to have them I guess I just wouldn’t have any. Ha!
FINALLY I felt the need to push. This is where it got oh-so intense. They sat me up on the bed and checked me- I wasn’t quite a 10 yet so the midwife had me roll onto my side to get me passed that last little bit. OH THE PAIN. There was no relief from those few contractions I was on my side. I tried to visualize, I TRIED to breathe, but it was just SO SO painful, all I could do was squeeze Blake’s fingers as hard as I could. I laid on my back and a couple contractions later I finally had the go-ahead to push. Yippee! What a wonderful feeling!

At this point I was being PRETTY loud. Do labor and delivery rooms have soundproof walls? I hope so. As I pushed, I remembered a conversation with my mom about the process of pushing (she is my birth coach in a way haha). Once I was done with each push I would relax to the point of feeling Clyde’s head being sucked back in! I don’t know if head’s can actually be sucked back in but that’s what it felt like, so I deliberately tried to not relax and to keep him pushed out as far out as I could. (Man, giving birth is such a strange, wonderful thing.) I was told to hold the back of my legs and ‘bear down,’ but what I really wanted was for someone to hold my legs for me- I was pooped! But of course, I didn’t say anything because my brain didn’t have the capacity to form the words. I tried to just keep plugging away and deep breath, PUSH, breathe- deep breath, PUSH, breathe. I remember yelling multiple times “I WANT HIM OOOOOOOUT!!!!” and the nurses and midwives and everyone telling me that he is coming, I can see his head, you’re doing great, etc etc. I was very sweaty and physically tired and wanted to ask for someone to take my gown off me but couldn’t for the life of me form the words.
Delivering a baby is such a funny thing- like an out of body experience. Your body just takes over and does what it was designed to do. It really is the coolest feeling in the world. I glanced at Blake and saw tears on his face, and instantly I knew that I was SO close to having my baby. I lifted my legs, folded over my belly, took one last big deep breath, pushed with all I had, and our darling boy was born.  The midwife laid him on my chest and the first thing I said was “He’s so big!” 7lb 15oz and 20 inches of pure sweet heaven sent glory.


We are so glad you are here, Clyde Watson. Love you.

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Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Ruby Jean is TWO

Holy fetch I have a 2 year old and in 13 more weeks (or hopefully less) a newborn. I'm freaking out about the thought of having two children but just want this pregnancy to do be DONE. I am hot, uncomfortable, constantly have stomach problems (I won't get into much more detail than that, for your sakes.), I am irritable and very easily annoyed, tired, my back hurts, and really just done. I was thinking today that when you are pregnant with your first, obviously it is easier to be pregnant than to care for the actual newborn, out-of-the-womb baby. BUT I would heavily argue that when pregnant with your second, it would PROBABLY be easier to take care of two kids than to have to deal with pregnancies woes AND another child. (Slap me when this little boy is born cause I know I will be eating my words, but until then I will just hope and pray he comes a little early!)

Moving on. Here are some pictures of Ruby's birthday. Cause I am sick of coming to my blog and seeing that picture of Ruby with her bink.

Rubes was sick with a fever the night before her birthday, and threw up for the FIRST TIME in her life. We piled balloons on her bedroom floor while she slept the night before and when she woke up in the middle of the night she was so excited to see them. We threw them all in her crib in the morning.

Really trying hard to blow out those candles....
We had hotdogs, cake and ice cream at Catalpa Park and borrowed a bounce house from a friend in Hidden Springs. Ruby was still a little sick and grouchy at the start of her party, and wasn't too into the bounce house. She perked up after a few cupcakes and loved playing on the park.

It was the year of the DOLL, but what else do you get a 2 year old girl?! She loved pushing ALL her new dolls around in her new stroller and putting the babies to bed in her new baby playpen.

And by the way, here she is on her first birthday. OH I JUST DIE. quit growing!

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Monday, May 12, 2014

To Bink or Not To Bink

So after we went to Vegas and Ruby was just driving me craaaaazy with wanting/crying for her bink and blanket all the time (she can't have one and not the other. They are of one entity in her mind.) I really put my foot down and decided to take the plunge into a bink-free world. Here's how it all went down, for those of you who care:

Sunday we gave the bink to the dog to sleep with. Logical thing to do. She slept fine and didn't make a peep. (Ruby, that is.)
Monday I cut off the end of the bink and told Ruby that the dog had chewed it up. Then I gave it to her to sleep with. She attempted to suck on it and would take it out of her mouth and just gaze at it with such a look of longing that it broke my heart every time. And if that wasn't enough, she proceeded to lay in bed, screaming, crying "ooooooh noooooo bink!" Breaking me down little by little, I finally went in and together we threw her bink in the garbage, had a popsicle and tried to nap again.
Tuesday she cried for 45 minutes at nap time.
Wednesday she cried for 15 minutes.
Thurdsay she cried for 15 minutes.
Friday she cried and slept (or didn't sleep) for a couple hours.
Saturday I put her to bed without pants on (it was a warmer day) and I went in two hours later and she was butt naked. First thing she said to me was "Mom, pee." I really just had to laugh cause it IS pretty hilarious how smart she is.
Sunday she was great! Now instead of asking for her bink she asks for Dad, and seems to cry more for him than for a bink.
And Monday she cried for Dad for a couple minutes and then went to sleep!
She always sleeps fine at night without it and has never woken up in the night wanting a bink. I would say we are about through with the fight!

On Sunday I told Blake that I really just thought we should give her the bink for naps, cause I am NOT ready for her to give up naps. He is the voice of reason and reminded me that in a week, she wouldn't even remember it.
*It has been another week and she hasn't asked for it. Miracles, I tell you!

So while I definitely could have waited another 6 months, or a year, or 2 years to take away her binky, I am glad I got it over with now. Now we can move on to a big girl bed, ya?! No. No more milestones for a while please and THANK YOU.

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Wednesday, April 23, 2014

A Whole Lotta Words

As you can see, ye olde blog is getting a little facelift. Changes are still a'comin cause I'm not fully convinced I love the look yet, but stay tuned.

So I started a new book yesterday. GASP. It is not on my 2014 booklist. That thing was one of the stupidiest ideas I've ever had. Seriously. And I am okay with saying that. How can you pick books to read a year in advance? Who knows what mood you'll be in 6 months from now. So I picked Serena by Ron Rash, which is a movie now starring Jennifer Lawrence, of course. Cause who else could play the badass wife of a timber tycoon in the 19-whatevers. (I am only a chapter in and that's what I've gotten out of it so far.) Someone has already been stabbed and there is an illegitimate child involved, so should be a good read!

I am full on nesting already and I just hit 16 weeks. HOLY CRAP do I want to just get rid of all the junk in my house. It's refreshing but also frustrating because I am addicted to my crap and don't want to throw it all away.

Ruby has been really getting into the whole "terrible two" cliche lately. Plenty of screaming, hitting, telling me no no no all day long. She is also addicted to her binky and blanket, probably because when we went to Vegas (I'll share some pics soon) she had it A LOT. She also didn't sleep much in Vegas, so she has been a little nutty the passed few days. And my goodness she has a lot of big milestones to cover over the next few months, including but not limited to; ditching the bink (she can keep the blanket 'til she's 20, I don't care as long as she doesn't suck on it), sleeping in a bed, and potty training. I also plan on tackling them in that order. Not sure when any of this will be happening but like I said, I'm nesting so that means the bed thing is gunna happen soon.

As I was fixing up some things on the blog, I realized there are way too many pictures and not enough words on here. So I changed things up and did a whole schwack of words and no pictures on this post. You are welcome.

Now I am going to go eat some peeps and have a bath. Naptime is a wonderful thing.

Wednesday, April 9, 2014



Coloring is a new favorite activity of Ruby's. She loves to sit at the table with me and I'll draw animals while she scribbles.


We took Ruby skiing and she LOVED riding in the backpack while dad went down the slopes. I'm so glad Blake and I have something we love to do together!